Aitch-Bar

Two Almost Physicists With Almost Something To Say

This Week in Wreak

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In counterpoint to Ryan’s affluent shoppery, there is the market of Real America, and the signature publications thereof. We live in the post-Gutenberg era, and quite separately have mastered the art and science of ballistics, so it is only natural to expect combinations of the two. What I am never quite prepared for is the gusto with which these combinations are made.

Allow me to BabelFish that for you: Damn there are a bunch of magazines about guns in this grocery store.

I list from the top left:

  • Rifle Firepower
  • Pocket Pistols (note double-checked, this is a firearms-related publication)
  • Crossbow Revolution
  • Personal & Home Defense
  • Guns
  • Gun Collector
  • Small Arms
  • Special Weapons
  • Black Guns
  • Gun
  • Bowhunter
  • Guns & Ammo
  • Concealed Carry Handguns
  • Military Surplus
  • Traditional Bowhunter

 

The greatest part was something I only just realized after a detailed analysis of the snapshot of the rack: To the very right of these selections I can spy titles including Disney Princess, The Amazing Spider-Man, Spongebob, and other colorful booklets. The children’s literature is directly adjacent to the murder section. I have not legitimately fathered a child (as you may recall), so I cannot opine on this with true conviction, but personally I would at least get a NASCAR buffer in between those two selections.

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2 thoughts on “This Week in Wreak

  1. So many questions…is ‘Crossbow Revolution’ advocating overthrowing the government with crossbows? Does ‘Black Guns’ describe the guns themselves, or is it a publication specifically for African-American gun enthusiasts? Doesn’t bringing ‘Concealed Carry Handguns’ to the register kind of give you away? And lastly, it is becoming clear that you are deliberately writing things that allow you to use the “Man Seed” tag.

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